The other night I had a dream that Hully and I were living just out of Auckland in New Zealand and I was going down to Timaru where my Mum used to live to run some workshops.
It was a really busy weekend and I was staying with our eldest son who in the dream was living near Timaru. I knew I had gone to see Mum but it was a short visit and I had already changed my flight time once.
The part of the dream that was really vivid.
Nathan had taken me to the airport, and the part I could see clearly was me opening my suitcase,
I was looking for my ticket. On the top of everything else in the case were two large bags of ripe tomatoes (I did wonder why I was taking those in my case).
The next part was me talking to the lady at the counter asking to change the ticket again and my hands were wet,
so the ticket was getting wet??????, I kept saying to Nathan, “ I need to say goodbye to Nana”, and he kept telling me she was okay because he had been
there prior to taking me to the airport. So the flight was changed and re-booked for 6:30pm and I was going to see Mum.
I woke up from that dream feeling really sad and pretty emotional, which isn’t hard for me, but wondering what it was about.
I did a meditation and realised that it was to do with Mum’s passing as it is coming up to the anniversary of her going.
About six months before she passed away, I knew that there would only be two of us with her when she went, but I didn’t know which two.
On the day she went I knew I had to go, things go thrown into the suitcase as I was trying to book the ticket, It’s a good thing we are only 15 minutes
from the airport as I only had 30minutes before they would be boarding. The flight to Auckland was delayed so I missed the earlier flight to Christchurch.
I then had a two-hour drive to Timaru and I drove fast.
By the time I got there Mum had gone. I never got to say goodbye.
I didn’t realize that I was still holding this.
Last night I was telling my healing class about it and this is what they had to say. I was blessed in the fact that Mum had waited for me, her spirit was waiting and I watched her pass over,
my sisters couldn’t see that. How precious that was, for some reason I had forgotten that.
From another student, “You need to forgive yourself for the quilt you feel about not being there”.
That is very true and I did that last night when I got home.
When we hold guilt and grief in our hearts to tightly we can miss what is really happening. Guilt can eat away at you, so when you recognise that you are holding
guilt for something you may have done or not done, get help to release it, or just talk to someone who you know you can trust.
Forgive yourself, as this makes you feel so much lighter in your heart and body as this is where we hold negative emotions.
I am going to be recording a meditation on forgiveness and heart healing; hopefully it will be available in the next few weeks for you all to try.
Hully and I went to the State Library in Melbourne last Thursday, it is such a beautiful building and the day was perfect.
We got there and people were sitting outside on the grass eating their lunch it was a special day. I intended to have a day every fortnight just
going somewhere to visit something different and learn something new.
I have a question, for those of you who have my book Achievable Enlightenment Do you think I should re-write it into a smaller probably fatter book,
with new stuff added and more exercises in it?
Let me know please.
For all you Mothers out there, have a wonderful Mother’s Day.
Have a wonderful week.